The Minion

I can’t believe the girls that have been sent my way. The one thing most, if not all, have in common is that they’re skinny as fuck. Some of them look like something left in my toilet after my morning glory. I, being a humanitarian, will never turn down a porn whore looking for work even if that includes her making a mess of my lovely home. I am known as the bringer of gifts. My gift to them is a hot load of Christmas spunk delivered fresh to the forehead and then a swift kick in the ass out the front door…

Riley Brooks told me she’s in dire needs of some money. It’s the same old song and dance with these insane sluts. A broke porn star? What’s next, a pizza with cheese? It was an unfortunate day since my heater was broken and I had a nice fire going on behind us. Riley Brooks wants to be a big porn star so she can makes tons of money, be famous, blah,blah,blah. I’ve heard the same thing time and time again. It was nice to have her soaking wet pussy in my face and then on my baby making shaft. She did a few things after our encounter but the biggest move she did was go into a witness protection program. I heard this scene scarred her for life. I almost feel bad.
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I don’t remember much of this slut since she is really is a flash in the pan. MMMM, now I feel like pancakes. Anyways, she was so disgusted by the amounts of food I had that she even vomited on me. I haven’t been that grossed out since a local Chinese restaurant stopped using MSG in their food. Joey, to her credit, was a trooper and took my cock with such gusto that I feel teardrops rolling down my face as I write this. No, wait…it’s actually sweat since I’ve been feasting since 4 a.m. Joey took my cum like a true champ but in true fashion I threw her out of my house since she brought absolutely no food. How fucking rude!
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My domination of the free world continues. I flew Roxy Jezel in from England where she used to sing in bars for pints of Guinness. I told her the following,”Come to the U.S and suck and fuck porn studs in great shape for tons of cash”. She obliged in our email exchanges and was soon in my place. Roxy Jezel was shocked to see me and almost left. I technically didn’t lie to her since she’s used to “pounds” as opposed to U.S currency and she soon had my Patriotic cock in her mouth. I used her mouth to re-enact the Battle Of Bunker Hill since I eventually shot my canon in her mouth. The tart had the nerve to wipe it on my belly so I sent her home in a shirt proclaiming love for the I.R.A. I always win.
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This New York fuck toy brought her east coast attitude and I just wasn’t having it…..son! I wasn in the middle of enjoying some nose candy when I got the call that she was in dire need of cash. As you can see I’m in dire need of stretching my limbs so we killed 2 birds with one stone. Myah’s tight little body was strong enough to support my mass as my raging cock brushed this porn star’s teeth. I sent her packing once my enormous sack was drained. From what I understand she’s back in New York and underwent hypnosis in an effort to forget the ordeal she went through. I almost feel sorry for her. Almost.
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It was a wonderful day to spend outdoors. The red fruit juice was flowing, the bagels were baking, and my stomach was growling. The only way my lazy Sunday could be better was if I called in a favor to have some wacky porn whore delivered to my door in 30 minutes or less. Katrina Isis wants to make it big in porn the same way all these other girls want fame and fortune. Little do they know that it’s not all it’s cracked up to be. You can’t make an omelet without cracking some eggs. Wow, I feel like steak and eggs as I watch this scene. Fellas, there’s a certain point in this scene where you can see Katrina’s soul escape her body. Be on the lookout.
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Ah, I remember Katin. She claimed to be a surfer girl which I guess she thought made her better than the other porn whores I’ve fucked. She was wrong, wrong, WRONG! I made sure that we partied outside since I was having my house fumigated for roaches. Apparently I left some food in some hard to reach places and now my home has been infested. Anyways, this slut with big tits is just another notch on my size 62 belt. I wrapped my churro so I wouldn’t get my cock dirty with whatever she might have had. You see, I could raw dog these whores but I run the chance of getting sick and being unable to dine at the finest spots in LA. After all, I do have my priorities. Katin was last seen on a surf board hoping to catch a tsunami wave for a ride to Hawaii. I hurt to burst your bubble honey but you can’t escape the wrath of The Minion.
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I flew Laura Monroe in from Eastern Europe. Growing up in Soviet controlled land made her want to go to the land of huge burgers, gas guzzling cars, and porn superstars such as myself. This seasoned cougar thought she was going to fuck 180 lb dudes who look like twinks. She never thought that I, a 330 lb man, would be the dick she’d be fucking and sucking. You see, I sent her a picture of my skinny friend when I first contacted her so she’d think she would be fucking some skeleton. She was in for a rude awakening once she got to my mansion. It was a good idea I had her return ticket home in my possession or I would have never nailed this piece of ass.
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I can’t believe that some of these wacky porn whores have the gall to try to humiliate me. After all, I’m the measuring stick in this business of porn. Porn star Cassidy Blue is a dumb broad with big tits who goes one-on-one with the sleazy one. Cassidy Blue threw me in mud and then turned the hose on me. I get the last laugh in the scene as always as she wraps my whopper and rides me until my balls drain. I hear she left porn after religion came into her life. In this scene, she prays to the gods of the cumshot because that’s what she got!
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This “daughter of a rock star”, Avy Lee Roth, came over dressed as a sexy nurse. I was exhausted because I spent the entire day running to deli to deli in search of the leanest pastrami available. My raging cock was sore as well from pounding some prime snatch a few hours earlier ( I nailed the counter girl at my local deli) so I wasn’t at 100%. However, I’m just a gigolo who needs to spread his seed anyway I can, so Avy’s tight pussy and wet mouth was a nice place to do it. This all feels just like livin’ in paradise..
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There’s something that tells me that Britney would rather be in line for Jay-Z tickets than to take my cock in her hoodrat mouth. She called up one of “my people” looking for some fast cash. I decided that her rancid snatch wasn’t worthy of my mighty stick. However, I took one look at her grill (no,it wasn’t a barbecue grill) and decided that her mouth would be fun to party with. Much like Brandy, she soon left the business after this. On a side note I spoke to her on the phone earlier and she said the hardest 5 years of her life was the 3rd grade. In case you’re not keeping score it’s : The Minion 3, Whores 0.
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Jasmine Tame is a porn star whore. She loves what she does and makes no bones about it. I heard she was talking mad shit about me and my porn chick dealing ways so I had to cut her down to size. I had us fuck outside as opposed to the in door fucking she’s used to. She’s also used to outdoor plumbing since this southern whore still thinks a great place to meet men is at family reunions. Normally fake tits annoy me as much as the waiter who doesn’t bring ketchup for my fries. However, Jasmine’s wet pussy and mouth made me forget all about that the same way I’m sure she hopes to forget that she ever met me. I suppose I can forgive her since she is a whore after all and they don’t know any better. I was able to tame the wild Jasmine only after I dumped my jizz in her mouth and she accepted like a hungry little slut.
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